Title: Pieces of the Dream
Author: Siamesa
Word Count: ~16,500
Rating: T
Betas: Chira Wilder, offline friend Hugh.
Warnings: Violence, medical experimentation on minors, institutionalized racism and homophobia.
Pairings: Billy/Teddy, Cassie/Vision, hinted at Kate/Eli. Background Xavier/Magneto, Scott/Jean, Wanda/Vision.
Summary: "It was sometimes said that the government spent half its money trying to exterminate mutants, and the other half trying to create them." In a world where cold war simmers between the human nations and the mutants of Genosha, some people want peace, some want revenge, and two groups of teenagers just want answers.

Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/400405

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( Dear BioWare... )

Trying to put a preloader on Giant Guild Wars Game.  After an hour and a half, finally manage to restore game to it's previous condition after being terrified I had lost it forever.

Fairly sure I know what I did wrong, for once, but far, far too tired to fix it tonight.  I'll wait until the game's totally complete.

Guild Wars: Mesmer: The Dress-up Game is coming along nicely- I'm around halfway done with the lineart for the clothes if not a bit further, and I've done all the hairstyles.  Tremendous fun.

Kidney hurts.  Worrisome.

I feel like I've made progress with the anxiety stuff thanks to the thing in Chapel Hill- not so much that I don't get anxious or panicky, but that I can work through it better.

Thanksgiving at granny's tomorrow.  Large number of extended relatives shoud be there.

Played "Overlord" DLC for Mass Effect, and wanted really, really badly to kill the scummy ablist scientist, but sadly this was not an option and I had to settle for Paragon!pistol whipping, which was a bit unlike my powers-reliant Shepard but still an excellent moment.  Do video games make me violent?  Unlikely.  I have been fantasizing about hitting scummy people with various weapons since a very early age, and have yet to purposefully act on those feelings.  (Did once hit my brother with a large stick, but that was by accident and I wasn't mad at him at the time).

I made a dressup game (if y'all are wondering why you haven't seen me, blame coding.  Lots and lots of coding)

http://siamesa.deviantart.com/#/d4fzl7r

It is for the Webcomic I Will Finish Someday and I am proud of it.  It is not amazing, but I am proud of it and of myself.

Hopefully I will be able to ride this high for a while, because tomorrow I leave for intensive therapy in Chapel Hill which I am nervous about, mostly because the doctor is a lot more confident than I am that he can fix me in a short amount of time.

I think I'm going to do a Big Bang.  I'm working on a fic that I want finished and I think I can do it.

Probably.

Sign-ups aren't open just yet.  I will spend some time thinking.

But I'd like to do it.

(Also, mom, if you are reading this please call me)

Some are serious, some aren't.  Be forwarned that I have taken my nighttime meds and am perhaps not entirely in sound mind.

Writing!  Writing writing writing so much fun.  I have a Star Wars short thing almost done.  Do not actually know where I will post it as I have completly forgotten all my FF.net details, and also if I log in I will feel compelled to fix all the brokeness in Crashing In Time's formatting and I'm not sure I can do that.

I have come to the conclusion that the reason I adore Billy Kaplan is that he is essentially Luke Skywalker.

Please take the above conclusion with several grains of salt.

I have come to the less pleasant conclusion that Something Needs To Be Done about our justice system, and also that there's very little effect I, personally, can have on that situation.  This leads into various depressing thoughts about whether I can actually do anything with my life what with my inability to engage in meaningful social interaction without panic attack. Is my current goal really archaeology?  Is that feasible?  Can I do that, even, be a grad student and do the grunt work and travel to various locations and probably have to use public restrooms?  And even if I can, is it kind of selfish?

Also it is my twenty-five-billionth career goal this year alone, so, you know.

I like drawing almost as much as writing.  I am making interpretations of all the Guild Wars armors and when I get Flash for Christmas I will make dress up games.  I have been reading tutorials.

Didn't I write this long drawn out comparison between the Skywalker, Bat, Maximoff-etc, and Fire Nation Royal families?  I should find and post that sometime.

Someone a few rooms over is watching movies. 

And I should probably go to bed.

Today I finished my timecards, came up with a new original universe, got Children's Crusade #7, and my Star Wars shirt seemed to actively attract boys.

A good day, overall.

There was an entire bleeping essay under LJ-cut in that last post that for some reason LJ deleted and I am going to scream

I'm grumpy right now.

I'm grumpy because Oracle's been rebooted.

I'm grumpy because I've been having panic attacks.

I'm grumpy because I burned my hand two days ago and now my teapot makes me nervous.

I'm grumpy because Bachmann just claimed the recent natural disasters were because God's mad at Obama.

I'm grumpy that apparently this is what it takes for women to be prominent politicians in this country, that women who think and care and aren't raving bigots get no attention.

I'm actually really, really grumpy about Oracle, and may make a seperate post.

I'm grumpy because my side hurts bad and I don't need a kidney stone right now, no I don't.

But I'm happy because I have tea, and the cafeteria served pasta and yummy bread, and Photoshop finally downloaded correctly, and while I don't know why God does things any more than certain presidential candidates do, I do know that He made these mountains and they make me happy.

So maybe I'm feeling pretty good.